Midlife Crisis

I'm currently experiencing the sort of melancholy that is typically experience by those, like me, that are near their 40th birthday. In movies, this is a period typically associated with a big purchase such as a sport car or a motorcycle but I've had no such desires.

My experience with midlife crisis has been one where I think more of death whether it be mine or my friends/family. If I do manage to reach old age, I wonder what sort of problems awaits me. Will I suffer from dementia? Will have knee or back problems? Will I be a grumpy old man?

Family gathering have taken on a new meaning as I'm left wondering if it'll be the last time where we will be able to all gather in the same room. Every year, we seem to loose a few members. How many more family gathering do we have left? Will we know when we've had our last one?

It's increasingly difficult for me to spend time on things that doesn't matter as there's a greater sense of urgency to everything I do. The feeling of invincibility I had in my youth is no more - there's a definite sense that life is finite. 

When we're young, life gives us everything and slowly takes it all away as we get older.

Change is inevitable.